Post last blog posting I had a hard week of cycling plus I went out skiing last weekend with Hitomi (and Kevin).
I enjoy all the exercise but my legs can't manage both. Cycling makes you stiff and skiing…due to the way the boots are constructed with your ankles constrained, you literally can't stand up without your knees bent. I know I'd do much better with more practice and relaxing and using the correct parts of my body. If I just stuck to the runs I could do comfortably I wouldn't hurt so much. But why would I pay money to take it easy?
Maybe I'm officially old, as 4-5 months of hard cycling plus a few weekends of skiing had apparently hurt my body. I've dropped my wattage in cycling class. I found myself too tired for "Zone 4" and "Zone 5" work. Thus I decided upon a massage to cure my tension. It felt good but also felt like opening old wounds.
Work-wise I got asked to take over a mobile web application project: I have now left the comfortable world of server-side protocol development to work on stuff that talks to people's browsers. Apparently, the code was haphazardly cobbled together and runs on Struts, which is old tech. And there's a couple of not so great libraries provided I'm not too keen on using. So I'm pretty much certain to abandon the Old Ways and head off on my own, as per usual.
I like to think, if I'm not providing a good example to others, I'm not doing my job. On the other hand, others rarely pay attention to what I do.
Ariel popped up on Facebook the other day and sent me a message about her wedding. Of course I'd like to go. But she's kind of turned into another Alsia. I got drilled into me early and often to Face Reality, and it appears my sisters are Teflon coated or managed to unlearn this or it was taken from them. Thus, for some reason anything to do with uncomfortable bits of Reality is no longer to be discussed, and we cannot even discuss not discussing it.
Somewhat apropos of this, I went to see Coraline with Hitomi, was really a children's story in the sense that children stories often have a moral of the story, or at least a message for those that have to live with parents in boring, rainy places in the Pacfic Northwest. That is, your enemies will know your weak spots, call you friend, be there to indulge you in every way at first, and as you grow complacent, easiliy manipulate you and take what they can.
For better or worse, I don't have a lot of interactions with strangers or people in my community. Maybe just occasionally I'm with other cyclists or hikers on trips? Either I don't get along, or care for, or naturally distrust anybody who's (overly) nice to me. And one reason I have avoided buying a new car is I distrust salespeople.
Adam Carolla, who now has a podcast, talked to a lot of abused teenagers who end up in abusive relationships or even get raped by strangers, strangers that seemly shouldn't even know they were previously abused. It's ironic that being a victim once actually makes you more suspecible to being victimized again. Do you project an aura of helplessness? and how does it manifest itself? In your tone of voice, facial expression, smell?